Hi Annie, I'm an attractive professional guy in my early 50s. A friend of mine asked me to go along with her to a dance just for singles, so I decided to I'd give it a try. It seemed like a pretty unfriendly place. Most of the women were difficult to approach. When I spoke to them, their eyes would wander after a few minutes--like they were looking for someone else to talk with. It was so noisy that it was difficult to talk.

I asked a couple of women to dance, but no one really seemed to know how. I love to dance, and I thought that women did, too. I'm not having much luck meeting anyone. I normally try to meet women through a local dance group - but no such luck.

Frankly, the singles dance was very uncomfortable. I guess I'm stuck going back to my dance group. Do you have any suggestions? Ron

Dear Larry, Congratulations on getting on theEvery singles dance is at least a bit different. These dances have been going on for over thirty years. Quite a few people attend these dances on a regular basis, and it can take a little time to break in. Some women feel more comfortable with a face they've seen more than once.

Find the best dancers in the room, or the ones that know the dances you do, and when a specific song plays, try asking her if she'd like to 'Cha-Cha' or 'West Coast Swing' or whatever dance that you are comfortable with. That way you are telling her that you know how to dance more than free-style. If she knows the dance, odds are very high she'll say yes.

The next step is to get them away from the dance floor for long enough to find out whether there is enough interest to take it to the next level.

Look at her eyes, smile, and ask her if she'd like to take a short break from dancing with you. Go where music isn't blasting. Ask her open-ended questions--for example, what brought her to the event, or how she started dancing. Ask her about her day. Compliment her about something that you genuinely like. If she responds positively, tell her that you would like to get to know her better, and ask for her email or phone number. Some women are more comfortable giving out an email address.

If you have a positive, friendly attitude, most women will appreciate it. Even if she's not interested, she might introduce you to a friend. Keep up the goodwill!

Also, don't just limit yourself to only meeting women at dances. There are hundreds of places to meet women, and many other singles events geared to various interests and hobbies. The trick is finding the kind event that's a match for you. Click here for Bay Area singles organization listings. You can also create or attend events at Bay Area Linkup.com

Something else that might help - attend a Flirting Field Trip. You'll learn to recognize the body language of courtship, which will increase the chances of women responding positively to you! Here's to a great love life! Annie